Body positivity, it’s everywhere lately, have you noticed? I sure have. From celebrities, authors and even bloggers like Sarah Tripp, Sassy Red Lipstick. There is this huge movement to move away from this idea of an ideal body type. What you should aspire to look like and how you view ourselves and others. As a girl who has been obsessed with her weight and body appearance I am all about this movement. It has to start within ourselves to change this idea, but as parents we also need to be teaching our kids self love.
I can remember when it started for me. I was about 13, with other girls on my softball team and just noticed a difference between how they looked compared to myself. Noticing how guys our age interacted with them verse someone like me. By no means was I majorly over weight, but I have always been more on the thicker, athletic side. Later that afternoon I remember going to Taco Bell and barely eating a taco. That’s the moment my relationship with food changed.
I love food. It’s something I really enjoy. From trying new restaurants and experimenting with flavors and dishes when cooking. I always say I will try anything at least once. It’s been a long time, but I’ve battled severe calorie restricting and counting, bulimic behaviors off and on, spending up to two plus hours in the gym at times. I once kept a calorie journal of everything I’d eat in a day so I knew how much I needed to burn to work those off, plus more to try and loose the weight. So regardless of my own personal views of myself and my body I’ve struggled to find the balance to be at a weight and an appearance I truly desire.
Is this because it’s an idea created and put in our heads? With unrealistic photos in magazines, even editing in movies and TV all of the celebrity roles models fitting in this specific mold. But, I want something different for my girls. I want them to feel comfortable in their own skin. I often compare my body type and size to my sister’s and I don’t want this for them. My girls are young, two and four, so this is coming at the perfect time.
Now there are so many different types of women for all girls to look up to. It’s easier now to find someone to relate to. It’s no longer only size 2 beauties gracing our screens and magazines. I can’t say my personal view of myself has changed, but it’s gotten better. Since teaching my girls how to love themselves, I am slowly learning to do the same thing. We all have our hang up over something, but let’s work together to not make these hang-ups about weight.
Tips To Teaching Our Kids Self Love
- Avoid stereotypes. Encourage your children to watch TV, movies and all other media with a variety of healthy body sizes and more gender neutral roles
- Ban “Fat Talk”. stop complaining about your body, especially in front of your kids. When kids feel their parent(s) have a negative view of their own bodies, they often grow up believing the same.
- Focus on other traits and talents. Talk with them about how they’re smart, good at a sport or playing a musical instrument. Talk up their characteristics like how they’re kind, a good helper and honest.
- Let your kids see you give yourself positive affirmations. If you are loving your outfit or makeup one day let your kids see you compliment yourself when looking at yourself in the mirror.
- Encourage movement. Talk with your kids about activities, sports or playing activities they love. Also share with them how the activity/exercise may you feel.
Having an obsession about your body and food is a full-time job. It’s very lonely and isolating. Depression is definitely a thing you battle when dealing with these stresses. By changing these ideals of the perfect body it’s allowing freedom to make other choices. Allowing not only young girls, but all people to feel good about themselves. We often talk about the struggles of body image with females, which is the majority, but men also struggle. There are so many guys out there that have unrealistic ideas of being fit and muscular.
Taking the time to start teaching these ideas to your kids now will help make a difference in their views of themselves and others. Currently there are a ton of body positive campaigns that are happening right now. Checking these out is a great start to helping you love yourself and teaching your kids to do the same.
Thank you so much for stopping by! Get Out There and have a Gorgeous week!
“having an obsession with your food and body is a full-time job.”. I just literally said this to a friend two days ago! That’s how I felt and I remember the day I finally realized it, I realized that the first thing in the morning and the last thing at night, I didn’t any longer think of food/my body. It was such a relief. You are being so thoughtful with your girls and one of my biggest fears is that somehow they will get this personality trait from me and they will go through these dark times. Thanks for posting and Sharing your story, I found it encouraging.
kallie flexman says
Thank you so much for sharing your story! It’s just one of those constant battles! I’m with you, I hope my girls don’t ever have to struggle with this dark demon!
Self love is definitely one of the best things parents can teach their kids. Thanks for sharing this lovely read dear.
kallie flexman says
Your so right! Thank you for stopping by